50,000 Year Old Grain Creates New Gluten-Free Flour


    Tucson, Ariz. - April 1, 2012 – Researchers from the Siberian Paleontological College discovered ancient grains that are free from the proteins found in wheat, rye, barley, and oats. Viktor Lyinmybuttov attests that the grain protein is remarkably different from current food grains. The grains were discovered by archeologists while exploring the permafrost area for fossil remains of ancient man. A large leather pouch was found near skeletal remains, which are presumed to be that of an ancient female. The grain was stored in the large leather pouch. The quantity of grain found implies this ancient tribe was grinding the grain into flour, which was then used to make paleo pancakes.

    The permafrost had preserved the grains in pristine condition. It’s much like storing grain in a freezer. Even so, researchers were not certain the grains would grow and reproduce. They were quite surprised to find the grain to be completely viable. “I was astonished when the grains sprouted and completely amazed when the seedlings eventually yielded fruit.” said Viktor Lyinmybuttov, lead research scientist on the ancient grains project. He further stated, “The yield of the fruit is quite low. But, it’s what you would expect from an ancient grain harvested by our ancestors.”

    After repeated growth cycles, scientists had a sufficient quantity of grain to mill into flour. The flour contains a very unique protein. In fact, the protein is even stickier than the gluten protein found in wheat. Natasha Nyet, head dietician and nutritionist, stated flatly, “This grain is a game changer in the baking industry. Anyone following a gluten-free diet should be able to use this flour as a complete and direct substitute for any gluten filled flour. It’s simply an amazing find. As a bonus, it offers substantially higher nutritional benefits than wheat flour.”

    Researchers are the in process of sequencing the DNA of the grain to better understand it’s genetic complexity. “We expect to be able to genetically modify the grain and greatly improve the yield. In fact, early results indicate that it may exceed yields of today’s modern grains such as wheat. This is important work for a hungry planet,” replied Russian geneticist Mikail Makajokovitz. He went on to state, “It will take several years to finalize our research. I would expect this grain to be commercially viable in about 5 to 10 years.”

    Assisting in the baking and recipe development efforts was award winning Chef Yuri Nevatelsalie. The Chef is world renowned for his magnificent gluten-free recipes. According to Chef Yuri, “This ancient flour is an astounding find for the gluten-free world. My baking results are comparable to my favorite gluten-free baking mixes from Yummee Yummee. This ancient grain and flour will someday completely change the gluten-free world."

    This is an April Fools joke. Perhaps someday this will be a real press release from an authentic research institute. It’s fiction, and an April Fools spoof from Yummee Yummee. It’s our intent to be a bit playful and have some fun. After all, it is April Fools.

    A gluten-free diet is a serious issue for millions of people, especially those who find it medically necessary. Living gluten-free is not a joke. Presently, the only solution for Celiac Disease is to avoid gluten in all forms. There is no recently discovered ancient gluten-free grain. If you do not follow a gluten-free diet, try it for a few days. It’s not easy.

    That’s why you need Yummee Yummee baking mixes. With our mixes and free online recipes, your fresh, natural, homemade baked goods are easy to make, quick to bake, and great to eat. No foolin’ around with blending flours or baking times. Proven recipes and mixes that produce great results - every time. Visit our website today and save $1 on each mix in our sample packs. It’s our one day April Fools sale - $7.95 flat rate shipping. Our sale is not an April Fools prank - order today.

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